Kismint

 WARNING: by reading this you are subjecting yourself to SPOILERS. Lot of them. And very juicy ones. All concerning Marvel movies. THESE SPOILERS WILL NOT BE FOREWARNED. THEY COULD JUMP OUT AT YOU AT ANY MOMENT AND EAT OUT YOUR SOUL. Proceed with *extreme* caution.


I saw Captain America today.

This is a review. Complete with gifs. 

Is it just me, or has NO ONE in the cast of any of Marvel's movies died? Sure, there have been plENty of fake deaths, but aliens have attacked, almighty terrorists have arisen...and yet all of our beloved friends from the good ol' Marvel gang are still around to throw a few more punches (and earn the franchise a few million more dollars). Perhaps I'm missing someone. But I doubt it. This whole I-died-but-wait-it's-just-a-cover-thing has me really discouraged. And don't even get me started on Coulson.
Sure, the entire fandom is happy that ((oh surprise)) he's still alive and well (and also heading a random spinoff TV show, no less). But once is enough. Both Thor 2: The Dark World and Winter Soldier have pulled unacceptably silly amounts of Coulsons.

 

  

So that became an ongoing annoyance. 

Maybe I'm just too used to Moffat's story telling style...because seriously, I was hoping for a few traumatic deaths that would leave me heartbroken. But nope.

 When going to superhero movies, one must always prepare for excessive explosions. There were plenty of those. I only wish that there might have been a more moving impulsion of character behind said explosions. I really had a hard time caring about the characters when all they did was chase each other around while playing dodgeball with hand grenades. 

However, in all fairness, we do get to see some nice development on behalf of Black Widow/Agent Romanoff. Which was nice...but seriously, does she like, suddenly possess a magical hair straightener? When does she even have time to do her hair? Or shop for trendy, top dollar outfits to wear while saving the world with miniture tasers.

But Steve Rodgers *does* maintain his rich historical background. I especially enjoyed his moments of reflection to his life prior to being dug out of preservation. Romanoff's attempts to find him a date was a good bit of comic relief. And a favorite scene of mine was the "would you trust me to save your life the way you saved mine" part. The whole story was saturated with compromises and trust issues, and it was nice to see that Steve had allies, despite the return of Hydra.

Speaking of, the Hydra people were alright. 

Which leads us to Bucky. 

Oh Bucky. 

You could have been great. You could have been the most vibrant vilian of them all. 

BUT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD.

FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, LOKI ALREADY PLAYED THAT TRICK LIKE...THREE TIMES ALREADY. 

 

Captain America is at it again, and this time, he doesn't know who he can trust. His best friend who is brain washed and ninety years old who happens to be programed to murder him. On top of that, the shady, super secretive, ultra security agency that builds mega weapons and hires the world's deadliest assassins to do their dirty work turns out to be *gasp* evil. Join the Cap as he gets things blown up, gets innocent bystanders shot, and dramatically inserts USB flashdrives and SD cards into miscellaneous computer devices.

Starring: 

Steve Rodger's muscle shirts

Amy Pond

Mace Windu

A guy who just happens to own a winged jetpack

Edward Elric

That girl from How I Met Your Mother

 and Donald Trump

 

Good:
Bucky saves the day moment.
Agent Hill
Bucky/Smeagol
Shield development
Twins
Peggy's scene
Steve/Tasha car scene
Who do you trust? (apartment and "I would now")


Bad:
Nobody dies: Fury, Rom, Steve, Bucky etc...
Steve takes out an entire aircraft singlehandedly...?
Rom's hair
Skirts
Falcon's helicopter plunge
Falcon's wings (cool, but...wha in da werld?)
Thousand foot drops
Camera actions shots

To mention:
Car chase...well done, but really now.
Crossbones
Arnim Zola
Twins/quicksilver and scarlet witch
Bucky = new cap


Alternate ending:  ...