They Are NOT Blue People!!

Alrighty guys. The time has come. So sit back, and swim through my Avatar movie review.

*Goes to Wikipedia to get facts straight*

...by the way, I stink at reviewing things because
(A) I'm really cryptic.
(B) I change my mind about everything. One minute, I can stand something. The next minute, I'm in love with it.

So last night, as the moon shone about 15 times it's normal brightness, I watched the work of James Cameron, which has become known as "The Movie with the Blue People".

All in all, this is a good---granted, trite---way of describing Avatar.
But before I go into all the details, I haffta tell you:
PLEASE DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE ---Unless you have obtained the "Family Soundtrack". This version of the movies aborts all nasty language (of which there is a generous amount). Your ears will be scalded by the time the movie is over otherwise.

So where do I start?

Digi animation? Script? Characters? Story line?

Yeah. Story line (I'll do my best to avoid any major spoilers, but seeing as how this movie is extremely predictable, I don't know if it matters much).

The time is the future. The place is outer space. This story takes place on another planet. Another planet---actually, it's supposed to be a habitable moon---called Pandora (by us earthlings). Greedy-eyed scientists from earth have found vast deposits of the extremely valuable "Unobtainium" (okay, so here you roll your eyes) on Pandora, and have built a pleasant little space station and headquarters above and on the surface of this alien planet (Okay, so I'm calling it a planet. Deal with it.).

They want that Unobtainium.

And by golly, they're gonna get it.

Enter: Dr. Grace Augustine. She specializes in research of the Na'vi---the native humanoids to Pandora (yes, the blue people). She's the head of the Avatar Program. And she has a deep admiration for this new found planet. Dr. Augustine---or "Grace"---and her fellow science buddies create "Avatars" to explore Pandora (the atmosphere is deadly to the human respiratory system). These avatars are spawned by mixing the genes of a human being to one of the native Na'vi. Ultimately, producing a Na'vi body that can be controlled by a linked human brain.

Now lets meet main character, "Jake Sully" (man, I just love how Mo'at says it when he meets her, don't you?? It's like: JHAKE SOULLEE!!).
This guy is an ex-marine. And he's wheel-chair ridden. The only reason why he is shipped into space to join the avatar-ers ars (arr-arr-arr-arr-arr-arr-arrs) is because of the death of his twin bro (we don't get a name, but he's a twin nonetheless). Twin bro was a scientist too, who studied the Na'vi for years an' years. But then he was SHOT and KILLED for MONEY.

...By the way, the beginning of the movie covers all of this, and after reflecting on it, I think the beginning is the best part. I liked the whole Jake narration. Sam Worthington ain't bad.

So we have the science lady and the wheelchair guy. All the rest are just along for the ride. Except the Colonel.

He's mean.

But he's an important aspect.

So da Jake dood gets his bro's avatar (and he's secretly thinking: SWEETNESS!), and he gets to Pandora, and he meets the blue pe---Na'vi.

And then its Pocahontas all the way home.

And that's where [one of] the problems are.
WHY IS THIS THE MOST BOX-OFFICE SUCCESSFUL MOVIE IN HISTORY SINCE IT DOESN'T EVEN HAVE AN ORIGINAL PLOT?!!

And why am I using caps so much?

( ^ Two questions I seriously don't know the answer to.)

Moving on.
As for the characters...hmmm. As previously stated, Sam Worthington did nice enough as JHAKE SOULLEE (...heheh...fun to say.), and I really don't have a problem with any of the other actor's ability to deliver lines. The characters were well-portrayed, and the script not bad. This makes for pleasing dialogue. Which ultimately gives a film a "worth watching sticker".
...Basically...

However, (I can't discus this topic without getting to this, can I?) the Na'vi people supposedly "live in harmony with nature" and "worship a mother goddess called 'Eywa'". In addition to that, life is really "energy that flows in between things. Energy is only borrowed, and it must be given back (what they say when someone/something dies)".

 *frown*

Uh...Whaaa?

So some things in Pandora are little overdone.
...Or maybe a lot overdone.
Either way, you have a few questionable things encouraged throughout the film. It almost makes one side with the snooty I'ze-wanna-be-rich guy who says something like: "You can throw a stick and anywhere it lands, you hit some "sacred fern"..."

It almost seems as if some of the ideas are cool, and quite elaborate---maybe even beautiful. But when you pull in a few blue-skinned tree huggers worshipers, give them bows and arrows, and create a sci-fi love story, something starts to crumble.

But the technical point was, to be honest, impressive.

Just not outstanding.

Oh yes, I was impressed, but only because it made me toy with the idea of better animation, better graphics, and something that DOESN'T look like two steps beyond video game avatars (I'm talking 'bout real avatars), but makes Avatar look five or six steps ahead.

But time does not permit. Even if you have the budget (which is pretty unlikely), it'll take a loOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOng time to simply make a blue per---Na'vi smile, or even twitch it's ears.

Speaking of:

THEIR EARS ARE SO TOTALLY AWESOME!!

Dude, I really want ears like that.

Even though it wasn't believable, the visual effects process is really something.

Cameras were inserted to the booms to pick up the facial expressions of the actors.

Ahhh...as a movie lover, I'm deeply interested by this stuff.

(Yeah, you're probably about to fall asleep in your spaghetti on account of boredom. Eh. Whatever.)

To finish this little critique, I haffta end with one...no, two things.

(1) The final scene of this movie was terribly, sickeningly, horribly cliched. If you know me at all, you will realize that I absolutely abhor of cliched endings.

(2) I loved the last second, where the eyes open and... "AVATAR"!!! This gave me a stash of ideas. See, normally, a movie has the title shown at the beginning. Well, I can't recall if this film had a beginning title, but it sure had one at the end.

...very dramatic, and fit with good flourish.

I guess that's nearly all that I planned to share.

In conclusion though, (and in my dad's words), movies that have neat effects, good scripts, and all that---they're usually forgotten. Yes, this is cold hard reality, I know, but it's pretty true.

The movies that are remembered, and the movies that worm their way into history are the ones with the greatest stories, the most brilliant plots, and the amount of actor talent.

After all, a movie is a story, and it's director the author.

So did I like it? You bet.

Am I adding it to 'favorite movies' on my blogger profile? ...Mmmh...Nah. There are just too many things, and too many small details that turn into big details that I just can't---and won't---accept.

I believe that it's silly, stupid, and downright dumb to worship the tree and not the Creator (I apologize for how harsh these words may sound, but I feel the need to come across firm in my faith).

Eventually it seemed almost as if this movie was trying to pull me towards those ideas. The idea that everything is ruled by earth, and the links between all living things.

'The End'

Signing off,

Plink-a-Dink\

...(Two minutes later, after reading more details about Avatar on Wikipedia)

"...Wait...did that say...??" *squints* "No, it couldn't be...it couldn't..." *reads huge imposing text:*

'...In 2006, Cameron stated that if Avatar was successful, he hoped to make two sequels to the film. In 2010, he said the film's widespread success confirmed that he will...'

"Oh great."

*face palm*